As I am reading over my blogs I am actually surprised at how I originally viewed polygyny. I feel as though so much has changed in my understanding and feelings towards this culture. Honestly I didn’t think this would happen, I knew how I felt about polygyny, it was wrong in so many ways, and I didn’t think I would ever feel any differently. Now when I talk to friends about this culture I find myself defending it if for no other reason than because it’s a culture that deserves respect just like any other.
Polygyny can make sense. I have discovered many characteristics of polygyny which are positive whereas I used to only see the negative. For example the large families generally produced by polygyny can be seen as extensive support systems unique to this culture. Another unique aspect of polygyny which I had never really considered was the relationships of sisterwives. Though this may not be true in all instances but in many the bond of sisterwives is intimate and fulfilling. This relationship is not possible outside of polygyny and can’t even really be equated to any relationship found in monogamist culture. Both of these examples demonstrate some of the positive aspects of polygyny I have explored of which there are more.
I have also learned through this experience of writing a blog that though it is easy to agree with my own culture and its practices because that is what I am most familiar with, this doesn’t mean that it is right, or wrong. I understand that every culture is different and the differences don’t make one culture better than another, just simply different. This has made me reevaluate how I view other cultures, but also how I view my own. Maybe things I thought I understood or believed in don’t mean the same thing. In discovering the cultural relativism of polygyny I understand the cultural relativism of all cultures in general.
I still don’t think that I will ever experience this culture first hand, but I have a better understanding of those who do. Though this study only slightly improved my overall knowledge of this culture, I still believe that there is much to learn, it definitely increased my interest and I hope to continue to explore and understand polygyny.
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This is a very interesting blog topic and I feel that it has relevance to the issues that we have discussed in class such as gender politics, equality and relationship models. These very issues of plygyny and how they relate to these topics is very well represented in your blog and have also been relevant in recent US news in the West Texas Polygamist Retreat scandal in April of this year. I feel that I share in common the perspective of most Americans. I have a hard time accepting polygyny, because I am so against plural marriage. I do not, however, think that polygamy counts as infidelity.
Dan Savage, sex columnist for “The Stranger” has a podcast that I listen to on occasion. He is a strong believer that not every person is innately monogamous, although some couples are. Some people have to go outside their marriages to fulfill all their needs (he only suggests doing this if all parties are informed about outside behaviors). He does not suggest plural marriage or divorce, but rather that sometimes a husband or wife will have a great relationship with their significant other, but might need to have their sexual needs fulfilled elsewhere. I think this is acceptable because it is an agreement between partners, but I do not think that multiple marriages where the woman is objectified, only known as 1st wife, 2nd wife etc., have a place in our society. I think that this opinion that I share with a large part of society was not represented in your blog. I feel that it would have been interesting to investigate why Americans feel this way and how this negative perspective affects polygamist families.
In response to your blog about Big Love, I think that the clip that you showed did not capture what you interpreted as the motivation of the show. What I could gather from that clip, I think that the writers and director have taken a more cynical tone than you interpreted. The creepy music behind the images and the doll-like, perfect family image is supposed to freak us out more than help us to understand these people. What I can gather from what I have heard about the show, it does not try to make the culture mainstream, but tries to expose the dark side of plural marriage. Any good show plays on the conflict among characters and the dark side to any situation. I would have liked some analysis of the actual show and character relationships here as opposed to a promo video that is supposed to give us a feeling about the show as a whole. You were right to recognize that it is an important representation of polygamist families and one of the few opportunities that Americans have to view polygamists, and possibly to form their own opinions about it.
You have included many interesting perspectives in this blog. It is evident in your reflection that these perspectives have caused you to redifine how you view polygyny. After reading your blog I have gained new insight which has also changed the way that I view polygyny, but it has not changed my over all opinion. It would have made your blog a stronger anthropological piece if you had outlined in greater detail what your learning processes was and why you arrived at your final conclusions. This reminded me of a blog that my friend wrote last semester about home schooling where she concludes with, “To be perfectly honest, I still don't think I would home school my child, but I understand that that is not what this project is supposed to be about. We don't have to be converted to the way of life that our topics present, we just need to understand why our culture can survive and succeed as a culture” (Stephanie Funt May 2008.) I admire the way you ended your blog when you said, “I still don’t think that I will ever experience this culture first hand, but I have a better understanding of those who do. Though this study only slightly improved my overall knowledge of this culture, I still believe that there is much to learn, it definitely increased my interest and I hope to continue to explore and understand polygyny (Mehlhorn, November 2008).” This shows that your cultural investigation has not allowed you gain a complete understanding of this culture’s internal logic but it has given you a new appreciation for polygyny that you did not have before. Overall, the blog was very well written and informative and you have understood how the course material relates to your blog topic.
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